My father has inscrutable taste in films. His most recent recommendation is Bridesmaids, which is admittedly hilarious, but he didn't love it for the charming Irish cop or the puppy party favours. His reason: "None of the actors were very attractive."
Luckily, I've got a few Father's Day film suggestions of my own, running the father-figure gamut from bad dads to dads who try a little too hard to dads who just want to blow stuff up.
To get a father's perspective, I also consulted my brother Geoff, a new dad with encyclopedic movie knowledge. After an embarrassing start -- see his Constantine suggestion below -- I think he did pretty well.
Without further adieu, here are some of the movies that celebrate the best and the worst in our dads -- or just plain keep them entertained.
Super 8 (2011)
Good news for terrible fathers! Even if you neglect your adolescent son and force him to go to baseball camp when he'd rather be making zombie movies (and even if you're a mean drunk who chases down your daughter in a Camaro) your kids will still love you if you make even a nominal effort to save them from a man-eating space monster.
Constantine (2005)
I asked new dad Geoff for his favourite movie of all time, and this is what he came up with. "Don't laugh," he said. I made a valiant effort not to. But he defends his choice: "Keanu Reeves, demons, amazing photography, Shia LaBeouf's only good role and a super cool Djimon Hounsou." Personally, I prefer Shia in, uh, Holes?
Leon: The Professional (1994)
Geoff redeems himself with this one, a film about a professional assassin who takes in a 12-year-old orphan -- Natalie Portman in one of her first roles -- and teaches her the trade. My brother likes it for, "the new age, non-paternal, father-like, man-girl relationship with the ultimate paternal sacrifice."
Ghost Dad (1990)
Workaholic dad Bill Cosby redeems himself for years of virtual abandonment by returning from the dead to haunt his children. This classic apparently got terrible reviews when it came out, but that didn't stop the kids in my family from demanding it on every other trip to the video store.
Terminator 2 (1991)
Poor John Connor is forced to find his only father figure in The Terminator, an emotionless robot and killing machine. As Geoff points out, Arnold Schwarzenegger's canon is filled with dad roles, mostly in terrible comedy films like Jingle All the Way (1996) and "the one where he's pregnant," 1994's Junior.
Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)
AKA: Creepy Dad Stalks Wife and Children. Did you know that this Robin Williams flick won an Oscar? It was for best makeup, but still. The best thing to come out of this stinker is Tobias's alter-ego Mrs. Featherbottom on Arrested Development, a character who gave us such memorable quotes as "Who'd like a banger in the mouth?"
The Die Hard series (1988, 1990, 1995, 2007)
It's a scientific fact: Dads love Die Hard. Geoff also suggests our boy Bruce in 2005's Hostage as a hostage negotiator who has to choose between saving a stranger's family and saving his own.
The Pursuit of Happyness (2006)
More magical thinking for bad dads. Hey, it's okay if chasing your stockbroker dreams means that your son has to sleep in a public bathroom now and then -- as long as you get really, really rich in the end!
The original Star Wars trilogy (1977, 1980, 1983)
In the movie world, it seems like father figures are often more dependable than real dads. In this case, Luke Skywalker's dad is a power-hungry evil henchman, but poor Luke finds a male role model in the sage -- and ghostly -- Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Face/Off (1997)
Geoff's nomination for this one is punctuated with four exclamation points, so you know it has to be good. After criminal mastermind Nicolas Cage steals John Travolta's face, he bonds with the do-gooder cop's teenage daughter.
Have your say: What's your favourite Father's Day movie?